Surprise

Surprises, they come mostly in 2 ways. One is happiness and shock. I'm one of that person who remembers from everyone's birthdays to anniversaries just to surprise them. I'm the most excited person even for others special days. I just love birthdays. But I don't know how to express this. Only one year in my life till now I got a surprise birthday gift which I didn't expect till then. It's so sad when you expect something special for your special day and most of the important people in your life doesn't even remember it.

Me and other kids who were born in July in our colony in Mumbai.

So now when I turned 24 yesterday. I thought to write down my little sadness. From a very childhood when I lived in Mumbai birthday parties were like something compulsory party of the year in everyone's life. But when I shifted to Kerala it just turned into a day that you have to go to the temple and make "Payasam" South Indian sweet dish at your home. A big celebration day turned into a very quiet normal day. Even after some time I just felt that I didn't want to celebrate due to this kind of environment. My Mumbai special birthday schedule is like going to school in birthday dress with toffees or gifts to distribute in my classroom. Everyone would sing the birthday song and after class, my family would have a small party which include a small number of neighbours and friends. Those were the great days of my life compared to the last few years.

My first birthday party. Me, My Mother and Poonam Didi

When I shifted to Kerala many things suddenly changed but I didn't think that change included my special day too. So, as I already told that I didn't have that one or two best till college. So, no one was there to gift me a surprise or remember and wish me. I didn't know it could become a big deal until I reached college. In college when everyone gave the surprise cakes to there friends and when no one knew or remembered my birthday. I felt very depressed for the first time.

I even wished that my birthday would have been on summer vacations rather than the rainy season so that I would not have to be this much sad. 

     

My First Birthday

On one birthday I got an unexpected gift on my birthday. Which I won't forget in my life and that gift was a set of earrings. I didn't expect anyone would remember my birthday even my new best friend. She gets missed the dates and forgets. Last year she called me on my birthday. I obviously didn't expect her to call but she called me. We had a good talk and even hangup but seriously she didn't remember to wish me.



I think many people nowadays only remember your birthday just because of social media. Thanks to them everyone at least wishes you even if they don't really chat with you for the whole year. Last year, I tested that thing too. I have turned off my birthday privacy. So I didn't get a wish until it was a late night. After one of my friends posted a happy birthday wish I got a few numbers of wishes but really don't you feel wasted if you too are not on anyone's priority list.

Me, Rohan Dada, Amma And Achan

I do get a birthday cake to cut but that too because I save up money and cakes are favourite. I do go out and buy the cake every year. My parents buy me a dress until now. But I have never have had my that special birthday party which I expected after a time period. Now today even though I'm writing about this that is to let you know that after a long time of expectation I just stopped expecting. Some say it's getting used to being in the situation. Maybe it's something like that. This will be my first birthday where I didn't even babbler about it to anyone.

Uncle, Aunty and Me

Even yesterday one of my best friends remembered me to send a text but the other one didn't even remember even we met face to face he had forgotten about my birthday to wish me so I thought let it be. 

My Parents gifted me a pair of Anklet and Waist Chain.

The Clay Modelling

From my childhood, I had passion towards arts. As a kid, I almost participated in every competition I could join. But it all stopped when I shifted from Mumbai to Kerala. Sometimes you just change as the environment around you change. I was not as confident and became shy in my own ways.

"I liked to express myself but no-one was really that much interested "- I used to think like that but later I realized there was a little politics there too. Because who all participated could cut the classes and practice and if you got the prize you can get marks in the yearly exam. Isn't it cool? But I didn't get a chance to go to any of the school events because I wasn't a bright child enough so I couldn't get to go. teachers always choose the talented children who are good in their studies too. It was not fully their fault. It was because the smart studying could catch the left out classes and notes but they really didn't trust to do the same with others. Anyway, every year I thought anything would change but it didn't. Finally, it changed but unfortunately didn't go as planned. I had to quit after almost I studied this song for a competition. This really broke my heart. That I decided to stop hoping. I completed my 10th grade. I got transferred to another changed school.

Everything is new. As we see in movies a new start. I had stopped thinking about these cultural programs or school competition. Anyway, when the time of these so said competition came. I decided not to participate in singing and dancing. Every kid wants to get elected to participate for next level. I didn't want any hard feelings for anyone. But somewhere deep inside I wanted to be a part of it for at least once in my lifetime. So this time I just came up will a plan why I should complete in an event that every kid in school wants to participate and win then go to next level school competition.

My school had a total of 600 kids in 12 classes altogether. It was a girl's high school. What will be that particular event that not many of them won't participate? Guess what. Clay modelling. This was the only competition I could take part. I registered my name for the event. Soon it was revealed that the clay modelling I thought was with clay but the clay modelling they took my name had to be done with mud. Of course, as everything, this to had to have a twist off its own. It's my life there can't do a thing without a twist. This time it was Mud instead of Clay. I just realized that I got into a big trouble.

But now I can't withdraw my name. I wanted to skip my class badly. I'm in high school. If I cant do this maybe I would not get a chance to cancel the event. So I  decide to go on with the plan. First I found the mud so that I can bunk my class and practice for the event. So everyone was surprised when I left my class to practice. The practice I just wanted some went mud and I just had to make the things that were said. Things like a person, animals anything. I wasn't a bit good at it. Because whenever I added water it always was too much. Anyway, I can bunk the class that was my priority. The days were coming closer.

Competition day. I went to the competition. They told me to make a "Carpenter". I completed my work by two and half hour out of three. Wasted my time by snooping around and didn't wait for the result. Because by snooping around I knew I will never gonna win this. Anyway, I was simply happy that I participated in a competition. First and for the last time as part of my school life in Kerala. 

My Certificate of Clay Modelling

The One With The Perfect Girl

Our parents all have that one person to compare you with. I too had that perfect neighbourhood girl who knew all the household work, perfect in studies, silent, obedient. compared to that kid you will of course be a spoiled brat. She lived close to my house. We had just shifted there. I didn't know her name but for sure she was becoming the reason of my loss of peace. Whenever I pass the way near her house. I was so disappointed because she is always working. Either she will be washing clothes or washing dishes, cleaning the surroundings around the house.

Me in 11th grade (2011)

I only knew her name through my Mom's scolding. When through we were neighbors we didn't know each other or talked till three to four year until our tenth class result were to publish. Anyway even if she didn't have more A+ than me, she had a good percentage of mark. I got into high school and I opted computer science due to my fear of cutting cockroach. She got admission in my school in bio-science department. Was can be the worst thing. I hated catching cockroaches and she used to catch these for herself and sometimes for her classmates. So my mom favorite child was her because she wanted a kid like her. Calm and quiet, obedient and does all household chores in this younger age. 

But did you all didn't wonder why she was doing all that work at home. Her mother was hospital staff so she always had to go for work day and night. Since her mom wasn't at home all time my friend had to work at home. Not because she was willing but she had too.. It's kinda sad. 

So one day I decided to give a shock treatment to my dear parents. My mom had to go somewhere and my papa only had half day job. My mom had left home beautiful by 9 and won't be coming until afternoon. So I just started my playlist and to do work which where pending due to my moms busy schedule. The works I had to do was washing a ton of clothes, dry, fold them, wash all the dishes,  clean the house and surrounding, cook curry/side dish for lunch which I do before my papa comes. 

My First Pasta

The moment mom left the house I sorted all the clothes in different sections Sarees,  new clothes, old clothes, fathers, mothers, blankets and bed sheets etc..and put them in Washing machine which isn't automatic at all.  So the time I waited to take these clothes to get washed. I started cleaning up the house and when that finished I cleaned up the dishes. All these work was done except cooking. I went to have a great bath after doing all this work altogether at same day and for very first time..I had to cook the perfect curry even if I'm gonna make it for first time. Of course I sure made great dishes. But I bet I have improved a lot from then. My innocent parents aren't very curious like me. They do like same food, same job, same place. Even in 15 to 16 years of my life. We haven't made a chicken soup on any day. So I'm the one who is so curious about each and every thing. 

Anyway, after that day I did get scolded but not for knowing any job but for not doing it even when I do know the job. On days like that I get know me more. Lonely time is not that much of bad time. Now I know cooking, laundry, cleaning almost perfectly. Parents will always remain parents nor would we change. 

Best Friend And Her Poem

Lallia and Me (Right to Left)

Lallia, My bestfriend forever. As everyone I too have a best friend. She is of course as crazy person as me. I got to know her back in our college days. One year in my college time I lived in hostel. Even if we were studying same department we were in different class. She lived in eighteenth room but she shifted to sixteenth room as she vacated the 18th room I got allotted to that room. Just missed.

But as every time there always a twist in the story. Apparently my roommates were classmate with her roommates. So she always would be in my room and my roommate in hers. We were 3 person gang. We three made many memories. But eventually our third friend left our group so automatically she became my best friend.

One year we blasted as no other girls. We would go for movies, play pranks on each other, late night assignments, exams preparation, project submission, attend weddings, party, part time job, etc.

Me and Lallia(Right to Left)

There is a lot to tell things we did together. Now that we are apart from each other. Even though we don't call or text daily. We miss each other very much and when every we call each other we would recall all the incident. We are just very compatible because what all elements I missed in me. She has it all. Very thing she is good in math, i'm the worst. I could remember a way even if I just pass for first time , she gets confused.

We can't plan out a thing. Because our plan doesn't work as for normal people.

Here is a small incident I would like to share:   Once we were going to a friend's birthday party. We had to get a train because obviously it was too far, we didn't know the place we were about to go so we have to call when we reach at the station. From the enquiry department station we were informed that the very arriving train will be the train we had to board on. The train came, we got into it. It was heavily crowded but after one or two hour we got seats. We were enjoying our journey by listening music, chatting, food. Now nearly a three or maybe three and a half hours might have passed. She asked another passenger how much time will it take to reach our stop. His reply was the ever shocking reply we could get.

For starters we had got into wrong train which was heading to very opposite direction we had to go to. Secondly we had spend every penny in food because we didn't had our breakfast and if we reached the birthday house it would be by afternoon. We had planned to borrow money from our friend when we reach there. But now at this moment we saw our plan was falling apart. But we could not do a thing because train is going on it's way. Even if we had to do something we can't afford to take risk at this movement because what we had was 40-50 rupees. So we decided to get down in next stop.

Our friends list was vast because our college was taking students from all parts of India. So we had North Indian and South Indian friends. So we called one of our senior. He bought us food and gave us enough money to reach our hostel. Although we didn't get to attend the birthday party .We enjoyed a lot. We explored new place and it was my first time I met this senior. We all have that one contact who would help us in anyplace just because we studied in that college. Not only inside Kerala but also outside Kerala.

Now, all can understand after reading this we are totally crazy. See first of all whose goes to an unknown place without enough money.

We both commonly love traveling, beer and long walks. We could discuss every thing and if needed one would make decision for other. Because we do trust each other that much. Now I'm in Kerala and she is in Bangalore. Me with my family and she with hers. She have a job there. 

Recently, she wrote a poem. I would like to publish the poem here. The title is "The incomplete souls".

                                 

                                                    The Incomplete Souls by Lallia